I’m so happy I’m old.
I’m 64 now and that means that when I found myself sitting opposite these two young men on a train this morning – in their sports kits, long muscly legs all over the place – I was able to say this:
‘I’m so glad I’m old because it means I can tell you two you’re so handsome I hardly know where to look.’
They roared with laughter, were clearly secretly delighted – and didn’t think I was a tragic old cougar. Just a nice old lady.
Ten years ago, when I was 54, I think they could have thought the cougarishness and I wouldn’t have said anything then, but now I feel freed by great age to say whatever I damn well like to whoever I damn well like.
And I liked Harry and Jake a lot. But not like that.
Because the other thing that makes me feel it was OK to tell these young men they are devastatingly handsome and gorgeous, is that I really wasn’t looking at them in a pervy paedo female-Benny Hill way.
It was admiration for the male form at its finest, in its prime. Rather as I would look at a Greek statue of a discus thrower. And how I feel when I meet my daughter’s insanely beautiful male friends. I admire their physiques and genuinely like them as people, but I don’t lust after them.
Although Jake in particular did remind me, very happily, of some chaps I knew when I was their age. Who I did lust after. Reciprocally. But that’s all in a different compartment in my head. I find it very interesting the way that works.
Another reason I think I enjoy exchanges like this, is that it reminds me of my wonderful late mother. She was a Character with a capital C and had very frank exchanges with people wherever she went, as my siblings would vouch.
She famously told one of the domestic staff at the retirement village where she spent her last years that she really needed to fix her terrible teeth. The young woman did – and later that year she got married.
She told me that the new teeth had given her the confidence finally to accept her boyfriend’s proposal and she was devoted to Peggy Senior (my daughter is named after her) from then on. She came to her funeral, which touched us all enormously.
So I will carry on talking to total strangers, which brought huge fun into my life this morning – and I think into theirs. And every time I do it, I will thank my darling mater for setting such an excellent example.
They are volleyball players, I should mention, Jake and Harry. I thought it might be rugby, but it’s serious level volleyball.
I might have to start watching it.
Lovely read Maggie. Yes, I have had similar random experience where I just have to tell men how gorgeous they are as I realise I am staring and I have always had fun and pleased reactions. I also say, if I am feeling tired, I may not look over 60 but I am, so can I have your seat. I've not been turned down!
Not far behind, at 56. I love random conversations with young people. I watched a 5 yr twirl around giddily with his imaginary “magic wings”. As I walked past I said, “don’t ever lose your wings!” ❤️